There was movement in the yellow house behind us. There was some shouting, and crying, but I could not make out what was being said.
“That could have gone better,” I said.
“It was not that bad,” Leah retorted, looking down at the map on her phone and trying to figure out how close the car was.
“You lost a fistfight.”
“I had her dead to rights.”
Leah turned the phone around, trying to figure out how to align the road.
“I had to drag her off you.”
“Nah, I would have gotten her.”
I looked at Leah. One strap of her dress was broken, she had cranberry sauce on her dress, her hair was disheveled, and…
She was missing an earring?
Leah rotated the phone another ninety degrees.
“How long till the car is here?”
“Any second now,” Leah said, readjusting her phone.
“Get away from my man, you e-slut!” Claire shouted, lunging across Philip toward Leah.
Her hand caught Leah’s dangling earring instead of her hair.
“OW! You daft fucking cunt!”
Leah jerked away, tipping her chair backwards and landing on the floor. Her plate followed, sending turkey and cranberry sauce across her dress.
Claire came around Philip and grabbed Leah by the shoulder, catching the left strap of her dress as Leah tried to get up.
The strap snapped.
“HEY! Get off my girlfriend!” I shouted, scrambling out of my chair.
Claire raised her fist, but I caught her elbow before she could swing.
Leah shoved herself upright and took a swing at Claire.
She missed.
“LEAH!”
“What? She started it!”
Philip finally seemed to grasp what was happening and grabbed Claire by the shoulders.
“Claire! What the hell are you doing?”
“Get off me!”
I caught Leah around the waist before she could make another attempt.
“Enough! Both of you!”
Mom was standing beside the table, crying.
“Martin! Do something!”
Dad stood up and put an arm around her.
“It’s all right. Everyone is just excited about all the new family members we’re gathering.”
I stared at him.
Dad. What the fuck.
“I think we should leave,” I said.
“No reason to leave. We can work this out. Let’s move into the living room and talk about all these new feelings. We can certainly make this work.”
Claire was struggling to get loose from Philip. “I’ll fucking kill you, bitch!”
“Come on then, you little sket! What, you jealous? I bet your fanny’s fucking minging!”
I stared at Leah.
Nope.
“We are leaving.”
Philip showed my dad the image on his phone.
“Oh, nice Chun-Li outfit, Leah. When was this taken?”
Leah reached for the wine bottle and started pouring herself a third glass.
I watched her fill it almost to the rim.
“Easy there, Leah. That’s your third.”
“I’m aware, darling.”
She put the bottle down and gave me a smile. Her words were starting to run together a little.
“Chun-Li? That would be Comic-Con. Early October.”
“Is that Dan?”
“Yeah. Dan’s great. He’s built for Ken. Barely had to do anything.”
“How do you know Dan, Leah?” Dad asked.
“Oh, Dan is over all the time.”
Mom looked up from her plate.
“Dan? Your Dan?”
“He’s not my Dan anymore, Mom.”
“But he’s still coming over?”
“Yeah. We’re friends.”
Dad looked over at me.
“Mia? Are you still seeing Dan?”
“Errrr… no. We’re just friends now.”
Leah snorted.
I gave her a look, and she recovered.
“It’s okay if you are. Polyamory is nothing to be ashamed of. It only makes sense in this economy.”
My mom put down her fork.
“Martin, what are you talking about?”
“Polyamory. Or a polycule, as they call it. It’s when more than two people are in a relationship. Great for rent. If you can get a throuple, or even a quad, into a one-bedroom, it really helps with the rent.”
“Is Mia in a harem?” my mother shouted.
“No, not necessarily. Polycules can have all sorts of structures. If one person is dating several people who aren’t dating each other, that’s more of a hub-and-spoke arrangement. He’d be the hinge, and the women would be metamours.”
“So, a harem?”
“I am not in a harem, Mother. Dan is just a friend.”
Claire leaned forward, looking past Philip toward Leah.
“So you have a boyfriend as well?”
Leah looked at her.
“Not exactly.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means Dan is a friend. A good friend. And he’s a boy, obviously, but he’s not my boyfriend.”
Leah seemed rather pleased with that explanation.
“A friend who’s over all the time.”
“Yes.”
Claire gave a little nod and leaned back in her chair.
I didn’t like the look she gave Leah.
“Yeah, we really don’t need to do it for the rent,” Leah added.
“Oh, even better. See, Denise? They’re financially independent.”
“So you’re still sleeping with Dan?” my mother asked, her voice trembling.
“No, Mom. He’s just a friend.”
“Then what about Leah? Is she sleeping with Dan?”
“Mother!”
“Are you both sleeping with him?”
“Mom! Please!”
Dad leaned forward.
“Now, Mia, you don’t need to hide anything from us. Before Philip was born, your mother and I used to swing, so I can relate to modern polyamorous people.”
“DAD?!” Philip blurted out.
My mother slowly turned toward Dad.
“Martin.”
“What? It was before the children.”
“That doesn’t mean they need to know about it!”
“Well, Denise, we shouldn’t be ashamed of our sexuality. We’ve talked about this.”
“Yes, Martin. Privately!”
I stared at my parents.
“Wait. You two were swingers?” Leah asked.
I closed my eyes.
Leah. Please.
Dad smiled at her.
“Oh yes. We met some wonderful people.”
“Really? How did you…”
“LEAH!”
She looked at me.
“What? I’m curious.”
“Martin!” Mom interrupted.
“What? We did!”
Philip put his fork down.
“Jesus Christ. Can we please stop talking about our parents having sex?”
Leah reached over and touched my brother’s shoulder.
“It’s fine. Your dad is just trying to be supportive of his daughter.”
Dinner was being brought out, and the table setup had shifted a little to make room for Claire. Philip was sitting next to Leah, Claire beside Philip, Dad beside Claire, and I was next to my mother.
Philip was still talking to Leah about costumes. Apparently, the video call hadn’t exhausted his supply of questions.
Claire was sitting beside him, looking less than thrilled.
“So, did you enjoy meeting my friends?” Philip asked Leah.
“Oh, they were lovely. You’ll have to tell them I’ll send over those reference pictures.”
“Seriously? They’re going to lose their minds.”
Claire put down her fork.
“Philip, could you perhaps talk to someone else for five minutes?”
He looked at her.
“What? I’m talking to everyone.”
“Sure you are.”
Mom had done most of the traditional spread: turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, green beans, sweet potatoes, gravy, and more cranberry sauce than we could eat.
Leah and I had been assigned sides and dessert, so we brought roasted Brussels sprouts with bacon and a baked mac and cheese. Leah had gotten instructions from Celeste on how to make both and had spent three evenings perfecting them. Three nights of eating mac and cheese had produced an excellent version of it, though. Celeste had also given us a homemade double-crust apple pie to bring with us.
Philip had brought beer, a bottle of red wine, and a supermarket pumpkin pie that Mom immediately put beside ours without comment.
“What was the last thing you made costumes for?” Philip asked Leah.
“Mia and I did Kill la Kill for Heidiween.”
“The Heidi Klum Halloween party?”
Leah nodded and piled food on her plate.
“How did you get into that? That’s, like, an ultra-exclusive Halloween party. You need to have cards with the Illuminati to get in there.”
“Well, I know a guy,” Leah said, giving him a wink before biting into a piece of turkey.
Claire seethed at Leah.
My dad tried to come to the rescue.
“So what do you do for work, Claire?”
“Data stuff. Not important.”
She dismissed him and looked back toward Philip.
My mother leaned over to me.
“Where are you living now? Still with Lillian?”
“No, Lin found a new place. I’m staying with Leah.”
“Oh? Nice place?”
“Oh, can’t complain.”
Leah must have overheard because she turned back toward me and my mother.
“Our four-thousand-square-foot duplex penthouse is a bit more than ‘can’t complain.’”
My mother’s eyes went wide.
“You live in a four-thousand-square-foot apartment? How do you afford that?”
“It’s more like thirty-seven hundred, and I don’t pay rent.”
“No rent? Mia, we were just talking about this!”
“Mom, it’s fine.”
“Who’s paying for it?”
“It’s through Leah’s work.”
My mother looked from me to Leah.
“So you’re living in her employer’s apartment? And what happens if something goes wrong between you two?”
“Mother, I’m not going to end up homeless.”
“That’s not what I’m asking.”
“It’s just me and Leah, Mother. Nothing Eyes Wide Shut about it.”
“Unless you count that time at the gala I brought you to,” Leah said, laughing.
My mother turned toward me.
“What does she mean by that, Mia?”
“Private joke. Leah’s just needling me.”
Mom didn’t look particularly reassured.
“Philip, how much have you paid this woman since you first found her?” Claire asked.
My brother looked like he was doing some calculations in his head.
“Fourteen ninety-nine for the top-tier membership. Four years and change.”
“Seven hundred and ninety-four dollars in total,” Leah said, looking down at her phone.
Claire looked at Leah.
“You keep track of that? It’s almost eight hundred dollars?”
“Over four years, Claire.”
“You’ve been paying another woman fifteen dollars a month for four years?”
“Yeah? I like her work.”
Mom put down her fork.
“Philip, you’ve been giving Leah money?”
“It’s a subscription, Mom.”
“For what?”
“It’s a website where you can support creators.”
My mother looked at Leah.
“And what exactly is that?”
“It’s a place where creators can share their work with supporters,” Leah explained.
“What kind of work?”
“My designs, build documentation, behind-the-scenes material. Depends on the tier.”
Claire gave a short laugh.
“Right. Costumes.”
Leah looked at her.
“Yes. Costumes.”
“Philip, you told me you didn’t have enough money to go away last weekend.”
“We talked about that. I’ve got bills.”
“But you’ve got money for her.”
“Claire, it’s fifteen bucks. Half my Warhammer group subscribes. We share build tips and stuff.”
“So your friends also give her money? That does not make it better.”
My mother looked increasingly uncomfortable.
“Mia, did you know about this?”
“I didn’t even know Philip knew about Leah, Mom. I thought that was pretty obvious.”
“And you’ve been paying your sister’s girlfriend for years, Philip?”
“Mom, I didn’t even know Mia was dating her until I got here!”
“Then why have you been paying her?”
“Because I like her work!”
Dad leaned forward.
“Well, I think it’s nice that Philip supports independent artists.”
Nobody answered him.
Philip pulled out his phone.
“Look, it’s not what you’re thinking. She shows how she makes her costumes. I’ll show you.”
Leah finished her second glass of wine.
Claire and I followed them down the hallway.
“So, how long have you two been together?” I asked.
“Almost two months now.”
“Oh, so it’s still fairly new. How’d you meet?”
“Hinge. We matched, went out for drinks, and got along pretty well.”
“Yeah, Phil’s alright. Better than the bear, I suppose. He won’t hurt you. Well, he might give you an Indian burn if you steal his ice cream. Speaking from experience here.”
I smiled.
“And the farts. Jesus Christ, the farts. Those you just have to learn to live with.”
She smiled.
“He’s better than most guys. Sweet, actually. A little clueless sometimes, but sweet.”
“I can’t vouch for any of that, but I trust your opinion.”
“He’s been really good to me. My last boyfriend was a bit of an asshole, so it’s nice being with someone who isn’t constantly playing games.”
“We’re talking mind games, right? Not Call of Duty? Because I know my brother’s K/D ratio.”
Claire laughed.
“Yeah, he’s very straightforward that way.”
I liked her. She seemed normal, easy to talk to. And Philip could use someone like that.
We reached the guest room and found Philip holding up his phone.
Leah was standing beside a display shelf, holding a painted Adepta Sororitas miniature between two fingers. She had turned slightly toward the camera, one hand on her hip, her head tilted, giving Philip a big smile.
“Perfect! One more,” Philip said.
Leah shifted her weight onto her other leg, raised the miniature a little higher, and gave him another smile.
Click.
I knew that pose. I’d seen her do it a hundred times at conventions. The little adjustments to her shoulders, the angle of her chin, the way she knew exactly where the camera was. Nothing overtly sexy, just years of practice making sure fans got a good picture.
Claire stopped beside me.
“What the fuck is he doing?”
I looked at Philip, who was checking the photographs on his phone.
“Taking pictures, it looks like.”
“Of your girlfriend.”
“Yeah, she does that.”
Claire gave me a look.
I had to admit, this was not the time nor place.
I stepped into the room and put a hand on Leah’s back.
“Hey, superstar. Maybe tone down the fan service a little? We’re at my parents’ house, not PAX.”
Leah looked at me, then at Claire standing in the doorway.
“Oh. Sorry, darling.”
Philip looked up from his phone.
“What? She’s just holding one of my minis.”
“Yeah, Phil. I can see that.”
Leah put the miniature back on the shelf.
“That’s a lovely Sisters army, Philip. Is that all freehand on the armour? The edge highlighting is really clean. Love the little details on their backs.”
“Thanks! Yeah, took me ages. The gold trim was an absolute nightmare, but I’m pretty happy with how the whole army turned out.”
“Oh, I bet. And you’ve magnetised the weapon options too?”
“Yeah! Makes swapping loadouts much easier.”
His phone started ringing.
He looked at the screen and grinned.
“Oh, shit. It’s the guys.”
“What guys?” I asked.
“Cogboy and ServoSkull. I sent them the picture. They’re losing their minds.”
He accepted the video call.
“Hey, guys!”
Several voices came shouting through the speaker.
“DUDE! IS THAT ACTUALLY HER?”
“NO FUCKING WAY!”
“PUT HER ON!”
Philip laughed and turned the phone toward Leah.
“Look who I found at Thanksgiving!”
Leah immediately brightened.
“Oh, hello, boys!”
The shouting got louder.
“VESPER!”
“HOLY SHIT!”
“Happy Thanksgiving!” Leah said, giving them a little wave. “Phil’s just been showing me his Argent Shroud army. Which one of you convinced him to paint little rainbows on their backs? Friendship is magic, but magic is heresy!”
They all laughed at Leah’s nerd joke, and then one of them started asking about her canoness build. Leah leaned closer to the phone, listening, then launched into an explanation about how she’d constructed the armor.
So much for toning it down.
I looked back at Claire.
She was staring at Philip, who was holding the phone up for Leah, smiling like he’d just won the lottery.
“Philip?”
He held up a finger, still listening to Leah and the guys on the phone.
“Just a second.”
Claire stared at him.
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“Claire?”
She shook her head.
“Unbelievable.”
She turned and walked out.
I watched her disappear down the hallway.
Okay. Maybe this was getting a little out of hand.
I turned back toward Philip and Leah.
Neither had noticed Claire leave.
Leah was explaining something about foam density, and one of the guys on the phone was asking whether she still had the original build files.
I leaned against the doorframe and let them get on with it.
Philip hadn’t even noticed his girlfriend leave.
Jesus, Phil.
A few minutes later, Mom called from the kitchen.
“Dinner’s ready!”
“Right, nerd convention’s over,” I announced.
Philip looked at me.
“Just a minute.”
“Nope. Mom’s been cooking all day. You can continue your little fan club meeting later.”
Leah laughed and gave the phone another wave.
“Lovely meeting you all! Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!”
The guys shouted their goodbyes, and Philip finally ended the call.
“Come on,” I said, taking Leah’s hand. “Time to eat.”
She gave me a quick kiss.
“Your brother’s lovely.”
“Yeah. He’s all right.”
I pulled her toward the door.
“Though I think you may have broken his girlfriend.”
“What?”
“Nothing. Come on.”
I came back out of the kitchen to find Leah sitting with Dad and Philip while the football game played on TV. I went over and sat on the arm of the couch next to Leah, laying a hand on her back.
She looked up at me and smiled. She was holding a glass of wine and listening to Philip talk about something or another.
My dad looked at me.
“Leah said you got a new job, Mia?”
“Oh yeah. I started last week. It’s fine.”
“Fine?”
“Meetings, release plans, Excel, retros. I’m living the dream.”
“Just remember, honey, we don’t get to choose whether we participate in capitalism. Just how much of ourselves we let it take.”
“I know, Dad. But I’ve joined the bourgeoisie now. When the revolution comes, I’ll have to put Leah up against the wall.”
“I’ve already booked us a space in the bourgeoisie bunker for when that happens,” Leah said without looking at me.
Dad laughed and leaned closer to me.
“You found a really good one with her, you know.”
“I know.”
The game was Eagles versus Cowboys. They had just started, and… blerg. I did not care. Guys throwing pigskin around.
My dad, however, was keeping one eye on the game and the other on the rest of the group.
“What else did you and Leah talk about?”
“Well, she’s British, but she also has Japanese citizenship. Did you know that?”
“Yeah, Dad. I’m dating her.”
“And she speaks four languages!”
“Three and a half, Dad. Her Spanish isn’t that great.”
“That’s three and a half more than I speak!”
I smiled at that. Leah was functional in French, not fluent, and her Spanish relied heavily on what she knew of French. Japanese was really the only other language she was fluent in.
“And apparently, if you two get married, she could eventually get American citizenship too.”
“Dad.”
“So your kids could have three passports!”
“Dad, we’ve been together a few months. Kids and marriage are currently out of scope.”
He lowered his voice a bit so Leah couldn’t overhear.
“Well, think about locking this one down. I don’t think you can upgrade from here.”
I gave him a smile and turned my attention to my brother, who was talking to Leah.
“So, with the Adepta Sororitas, is the gun a 3D print?”
“Nah, it was foam that I carved and added some 3D-printed details to.”
Leah took a sip of her wine.
“It’s still in London. I didn’t bring my canoness costume to the US.”
“When did you leave the UK?”
“This summer. I guess I’ve been in the US for six months now?”
“You work in cosplay here?”
“Adjacent, yeah.”
Claire was sitting on the other side of Philip, looking increasingly bored with the conversation.
“So, Philip, weren’t you going to show me your old room?”
“Yeah, in a bit,” he replied, still looking at Leah.
“Your old room?” Leah asked.
“Mom turned it into a guest room when I moved out. Most of my stuff is still in there, though.”
“Oh, I’d love to see your Adepta Sororitas army.”
Philip perked up.
“Actually, I think that might still be in the closet.”
“Really? Can I see?”
“Sure!”
Philip got up from the couch, and Leah followed him.
I looked over at Claire, who was still sitting beside me.
“You coming?”
She looked toward the hallway where Philip and Leah had disappeared and let out a long sigh.
“I guess I should.”
She got up and followed them.
I gave Leah a glass, and filled it up with red wine.
“Alcohol kills germs, right? Should help with your cold.”
“I’m not sure that’s how it works.”
“Keeps you warm at least.”
“Also not how that works.”
She took a sip.
“Mm, tasty. Might make me happy, though.”
“See? Already working. I’m going to the kitchen to help Mom. You stay out here with Dad and Philip. Behave?”
“What do you expect me to do? Start a fistfight? I’ll stay on the couch and relax, don’t worry.”
I saw Philip lean over to Leah as I moved into the kitchen.
My mother was over by the stove, checking on some pots. I gave her a wave and asked if I could help with anything.
“Can you start transferring stuff into serving bowls?” She pointed toward the counter. The cranberry sauce was still in a can, and the bread rolls were on a cooling rack.
“Sure,” I said, starting with the bread rolls.
“So, Leah and you. You been together long?”
“We started dating late summer, early August? We haven’t really settled on the date when we actually got together.”
“And when did you break up with Dan?”
I sighed.
“Me and Dan decided we didn’t work well as a couple back in February.”
“Is that why he wasn’t there for our Fourth of July party? You said he was working?”
“Yeah, sorry about that. I lied. I didn’t want you to be disappointed.”
“But you two were so good together.”
“No, we were not. We wanted very different things. It would not have lasted.”
“And you think Leah wants the same things?”
“Yeah, Mom. We work really well together.”
“You’ve only been dating a few months.”
“So?”
“Mia, she’s from another country. She grew up in a different culture, with different expectations. Have you even talked about where you want to live? Whether she’d want to go back to England someday?”
“She lives here now, Mom.”
“For now. What about her family? Her parents? Do you know what they expect of her?”
“I’ve met her mother.”
“And?”
“And she’s terrifying, but she likes me.”
Mom gave me a look.
“That’s not what I’m asking.”
“Then what are you asking?”
“I’m asking whether you’ve thought about what your lives would actually look like together. She’s British, her family’s Japanese, and you grew up here. Those differences don’t just disappear because you’re in love.”
I put another roll into the basket.
“Dad’s Norwegian grandparents didn’t stop you two from getting married.”
“Your father grew up in New Jersey, Mia.”
“Fine.”
“And there’s the other thing.”
“What other thing?”
“You’ve always dated men.”
I stopped.
“As far as you know.”
Mom looked at me.
“Mia.”
“Mom.”
“I’m trying to understand, but I saw you fall in love with Jason when you were fourteen, and you pined after him until you got together at sixteen. And I know about Aron from your days at college, and Dan. You like men, Mia. There is no doubt in my mind, and now you bring home a girl and tell me that you are serious?”
“Because I am serious about her.”
“And that car you arrived in? What kind of money does this girl come from?”
I sighed.
“Seriously?”
“I saw it, Mia. You don’t come from that kind of money. Does she understand what your life has been like? Do you understand hers?”
“Mom, that wasn’t our car. It was a car service, like Uber. We don’t have a car. Leah isn’t that rich. We manage. She has a bit more money, yes, but we’re not some one-percent elites.”
“Okay, but you and Dan wanted different things, and you’re telling me that was enough to end your relationship. Now you’re dating someone from a different country, a different social class, an entirely different world financially, and apparently you’ve never even told your parents you liked women.”
I looked at her.
“You’re making Leah sound like an alien.”
“No. I’m asking whether you’ve actually thought any of this through.”
I let my head fall.
“Mom, I have never been more in love with another person than I am with Leah. She is the missing puzzle piece that I did not know I needed. If she was a man, I would feel the same way, but she happens to be a woman. I know she adores me, and she is a mess without me.”
“Mia, you are getting older. You need to take this seriously.”
“I am.”
“I had such hopes for you, especially after Philip turned into such a mess.”
“Philip brought a girlfriend.”
“Yeah… it’s his third this year.”
I scratched my forehead.
“Shit… I didn’t know.”
“Yeah, he’s still finding his way, but I’m not sure he knows where he wants to go.”
“He never really did.”
We both went quiet for a second.
“I just want you to be happy, Mia.”
“I am happy, Mom. More than I ever have been.”
“And it’s not coercive? She’s not in some rich-person cult? Making you have sex with her and others for her own amusement? I’ve read books, Mia. I know what they do.”
“Mother.”
“Well? Can’t I worry about you?”
“I am not in a cult.”
My mother drew in a breath.
“Are we done here?”
She nodded.
We were sitting in the living room when the doorbell rang.
“Ah, that must be your brother,” Dad said, getting up from his chair.
I heard Dad welcome my brother and someone else in the hallway, so I got up to see who Philip had brought with him.
Philip was standing in the hallway, taking off his coat beside a woman I’d never seen before.
My brother was a little taller than me, with short dirty blonde hair that was already starting to thin at the temples. He was wearing dark jeans and a blue button-down shirt, which was about as dressed up as Philip ever got. His hands were still a little rough from work, and he’d managed to miss a spot of grease near one of his fingernails.
The woman beside him was around my height, with shoulder-length blonde hair, a round face, and a warm smile. She wore a burgundy sweater, black jeans, and ankle boots. Pretty, in a friendly, approachable way.
“Hey, Mia!” Philip said, coming over to give me a hug.
“Hey, Phil. Who’s this?”
“Oh, right. This is Claire. My girlfriend.”
Claire smiled and offered her hand.
“Nice to finally meet you. Philip’s told me a lot about you.”
“All lies, I hope.”
She laughed.
“Mostly good things, actually.”
Philip looked a little embarrassed, and Claire reached over and straightened the collar of his shirt before taking his hand.
I smiled at that.
She seemed nice. And Philip actually looked happy.
We went back to the living room and sat down on the sofa. Philip started looking at Leah strangely.
“So, this is Leah. She’s my girlfriend. Leah, this is Philip.”
Leah reached out her hand, and Philip took it.
“Nice to meet you.”
Philip didn’t let go of her hand.
“Holy shit! You’re Vesper Velvet!”
Leah’s eyes went wide.
“Yes… yes, I am.”
“I’m a HUGE fan.”
She smiled, and I hoped my brother was more socially aware than I had known him to be.
“I’m a subscriber to your Patreon.”
“I’m LoneWolf31.”
Leah let out a breath.
“LoneWolf? That’s you?!”
She gave him a big hug.
Okay, that’s a reversal if I ever saw one.
“Mia! Your brother is LoneWolf? He’s been subscribing to my Patreon since… shit, my first Warhammer cosplay when I was nineteen.”
She looked over at my brother.
“Yeah, you subbed with my Sisters of Cydonia costume breakdown? You asked all the questions about the tail movement and how I pulled it off.”
My brother smiled.
“Yeah, I really appreciated how you showed me the guts of that thing. Really interesting build.”
I knew I shouldn’t have been shocked, but I was.
“Can I get a picture with you? My friends will never believe that we met.”
“Your friends know me?”
“I play Warhammer with Cogboy33 and ServoSkull25 every Thursday. We pushed it back because of Thanksgiving this week, but they’ll be stunned next week!”
“You’re friends with Cogboy and ServoSkull? Small world.”
Claire looked between them, smiling politely. I wasn’t sure she’d understood a word of it.
I could practically hear the gears turning in my brother’s head.
“So how did you two meet, anyway?” Philip asked.
“I moved to New York for work. We met through a mutual friend, got along rather well, and one thing led to another.”
“Just like that?”
“Well, not quite that quickly,” Leah said, smiling.
“You know this lady from your nerd games?” Claire asked.
“Not really games,” Philip said. “She’s a cosplayer. I’ve followed her work for years.”
“Oh, right. That’s the people who dress up like your nerd games?”
“Yeah! She’s really good at it.”
Claire smiled at Leah.
“Well, that’s quite a coincidence.”
“It really is,” Leah said.
Philip was still grinning like an idiot.
Leah reached into her handbag and pulled out the little Japanese medicine box. She popped another pill out of its blister pack.
“Still feeling sick?” I asked.
“I just think I need a top-up. Could you get me something to drink, darling?”
“Sure. Be right back.”
I headed to the kitchen to get Leah something to drink.
I rang the doorbell, and a moment later Dad opened the door.
“Mia!”
He pulled me into a hug.
“Hey, Dad.”
He stepped back and looked at Leah.
“And who is this lovely lady?”
“I’m Leah Takahashi. Lovely to meet you, Mr. Williams.”
“Martin. Please. We’re not that formal around here.”
He shook her hand.
“Takahashi? Now that’s a Japanese name, but you sound properly British! Mia didn’t tell us any of this!”
“Guilty as charged.”
“Well, I suppose we can forgive a little colonialism in the family.”
“That’s very generous. Though with a British upbringing and Japanese parents, I think my family has rather more colonial history to answer for than most.”
Dad laughed.
“Oh, I like this one, Mia.”
“Dad,” I groaned.
“What? I’m being welcoming!”
“You’re doing a fantastic job, Martin. Couldn’t have asked for more,” Leah said, smiling.
He laughed again and ushered us inside.
“Denise! They’re here!”
Mom appeared from the kitchen, wiping her hands on a dish towel.
“Mia! Honey!”
She hugged me, then turned to Leah.
“And who is this? Your father said you were bringing someone. I thought it might be Dan, or perhaps Lillian.”
“Mom, this is Leah. My girlfriend.”
Leah reached out a hand.
“Lovely to meet you, Mrs. Williams.”
“Denise, please.”
Mom ignored the hand and gave Leah a hug as well.
“You’re very welcome here, sweetheart. It’s just a surprise, that’s all. Mia never mentioned you before.”
“Mom.”
“What? I’m just saying! Last we heard, you were still with Dan.”
“Mom!”
“Sorry, sorry. I didn’t mean anything by it.” She turned to Leah. “It’s just that Mia hasn’t told us much about you. Or, well, anything really.”
Leah smiled.
“That’s quite all right. She’s been rather mysterious about you lot as well.”
Dad burst out laughing.
“Oh, she’s going to fit right in.”
I looked between them.
Yeah, I should have clocked this a mile away. My dad would love Leah, and Leah would have him wrapped around her finger in no time.
Mom headed back into the kitchen, leaving us with Dad.
We settled into the living room, Leah taking a seat on the sofa while I sat beside her.
“So, Mia,” Dad said, settling into his armchair. “Can I ask you something?”
“What’s up, Dad?”
“It’s kinda weird bringing this up with your partner in the room, but I’ll do my best to keep it PC.”
I groaned internally. This was gonna be bad.
“But why did you never say that you were gay?”
I let the groan out verbally.
“Dad.”
“I’m sorry, I mean queer? Is that what you prefer? Did I do something wrong? Was I too strict when you were growing up? Did I make you feel like you had to stay in the closet?”
“Dad, you? Strict? I’m surprised I didn’t turn out more gay with you around.”
“Well, I worry. Maybe I pushed heteronormativity without realizing it. Your mother and I always talked about you finding a nice boy, getting married, having children.”
“Mom talked about that. You talked about dismantling capitalism and abolishing gender roles.”
Leah laughed.
“Sounds like you were performing praxis since you could walk.”
“You have no idea,” I said. “Really.”
Dad looked concerned.
“Then why didn’t you tell us?”
“Because there wasn’t anything to tell you, Dad. I dated guys. I liked guys. I still like guys. I just happen to be dating Leah now.”
“So you’re bisexual?”
“Sure. But it’s not about gender, Dad.”
“So you’re pan?”
“I’m not super into sexuality as a label, Dad. Go with bi if you need.”
“I don’t need a label, honey. I just want you to feel comfortable being yourself around us.”
“Dad. I brought my girlfriend to meet my family without mentioning that I wasn’t in a straight relationship, because I knew it wouldn’t be a problem in my household. Don’t you think that says more about how you raised me than you think?”
Leah covered her mouth, trying not to laugh.
Dad considered that for a moment.
“Fair enough.”
“Maybe I should have thought a bit more to prepare Mom, but she’ll survive.”
Dad smiled.
“You do make me proud, Mia.”
“See?”
“Although I would’ve appreciated a little warning if you’d brought a Republican.”
“Dad!”
“I was in the Young Conservatives when I was at university,” Leah commented.
Dad gave me a sharp look.
“Does she still hold these opinions?”
“She’s proper bourgeoisie, Dad.”
“Mia, you know how I feel about the bourgeoisie.”
“Yes, Dad. You made me read Marx when I was fourteen.”
“And evidently none of it stuck.”
“Oh, I wouldn’t say that,” Leah said. “She certainly knows how to redistribute wealth.”
Dad laughed.
I looked at Leah.
Great. She’d found another audience.
Leah had woken up yesterday with a fierce cold, but was very stubborn about how she could handle meeting my parents.
Before we left the apartment, she showed me her secret.
Leah rummaged through her bag and pulled out a small box of Japanese cold medicine.
“What’s that?”
“Lulu Attack. It’s way better than the American or English stuff. Works miracles.”
She pushed two tablets out of the blister pack, then stopped and pushed out two more.
“I think this calls for a double dose.”
I looked at the box. It was almost entirely in Japanese, but there was a little picture of a beer bottle with a red line through it.
“What’s that mean?”
“Oh, don’t use it if you’re a drunk. Nothing to worry about.”
“You sure?”
“Yes, Mia. I’m the one who knows Japanese, right?”
She swallowed the tablets with some water and put the box away.
Thomas was waiting outside our building with the long-haul car. My favorite.
“Are we heading to New Jersey today?” he asked in a warm and welcoming tone.
“Yeah, off to my parents’ place. You don’t have anywhere you need to be for Thanksgiving?”
“Not me, my parents live in Florida and will come for a visit for Christmas.”
My parents still lived in my childhood house in Maplewood, New Jersey, and it was a ninety-minute drive to get there from our apartment.
As we got out of New York proper, I could see the medicine genuinely worked. Leah looked more awake and attentive than she had since she got the cold. I wondered what ancient secrets these Japanese doctors had hidden away from Americans, and why CVS couldn’t stock the stuff.
“Okay, so ground rules for today,” I said to Leah.
She looked at me as she put on her earrings. They were green and dangly, very feminine.
“I know, I know. We don’t discuss our privileged arrangement with my mother’s company. We don’t talk about our relationship with Dan. We don’t talk about any of the prestigious events we attend.”
“And?”
“We don’t discuss your employment history, the apartment, or how much money I make.”
“Good. But don’t forget. No sex stuff. None of our cosplay shenanigans. No mention of my adventures with Lin. No explaining how we actually met Dan.”
She looked me in the eye.
“Mia, I understood the assignment the first time.”
“I’m serious.”
“So am I. We’re a perfectly ordinary lesbian couple, living in a perfectly ordinary apartment, with perfectly ordinary friends and hobbies.”
“See, you get it.”
“I will try to be as boring as I possibly can. No arguments, no fighting. I got this.”
“Just for today. My parents have a heteronormative life mapped out for me: Dan, a minivan, a Costco membership.”
I looked out the car window at the city we were leaving.
“Dan said he got a Christmas card from my mom the other day.”
Leah looked at me.
“Did you?”
“Nope.”
We arrived at my parents’ place around three, and Thomas opened the car door for us.
“You off for the rest of the day?” I asked him.
“I’m on the clock until you’re both safely home. Just ping when you’re ready to leave.”
“We are going to be here for a few hours, you can drive to Newark, get some food?”
He smiled at me.
“I might do that.”
He drove off, and Leah and I stood looking at the yellow one-story house with a white picket fence.
“You grew up here?”
“Yeah, I had a good childhood. No stress, no abuse, no worries. It was a good place.”
“Looking forward to seeing how that is.”